Feminism and women are tied up together since the idea of it first emerged in 19th century. Well, this is 2012 which means we are officially and reliably a hundred and forty years down the road of feminism now. Still it’s a matter of shame that how less we know about the very topic itself and how misled we are with the tiny knowledge of that vast concept. Perhaps that’s the reason why like every other mishaps, when it comes down to build ups and break-ups in relationships, females are held culprit most of the time. This is especially true in the case of a marriage failure. The woman has to endure almost the entire social and emotional condemnation.
And sometimes, a married woman often hear people say, “You should’ve hold on to the marriage no matter how hard it is. It’s for the welfare of the kids,” or “As a woman, it’s your job to be a submissive wife. You’re duty-bound to your husband all the time.”
See, nobody gets into a marriage then expects to get divorced someday. Still, it happens, due to common causes like domestic violence, domineering husbands, incompatibility, and even extra-marital affairs. The list goes on and on. But whatever the reason might be, the woman is forced to take the blow for it. She feels so helpless and fearful of her future that she tries her best to go on with the relationship, for the belief that it’s her duty to do so.
Surely feminism and women are greatly interrelated, but the matter doesn’t just end there. See, we tend to think that feminists are only females just because the word itself relates to women. Well, that’s a totally misguiding and entirely misunderstood interpretation of it. This is why this idea has not been flourished up to its potential until now.
See, feminism isn’t something that flushes the men down the system, or gangs up the women to do something that hideous and monstrous against men that a man can’t ever permit. It simply speaks up to the highest tone of its voice for equal rights for men and women as humans which could be and should be acceptable to any modern, rational and decent man. If our men don’t sideline the idea of feminism just thinking it as a female issue only, they too could see how justified and rational our stand is and be respectable for it. It is really important for a relationship to click and stay healthy since a relationship is a two-way road should be built on measurements, balance and the right kind of proportion.
The economic dependence is another key component of this entire discussion. Most of us, the women, aren’t economically independent enough to carry their living on their own and even after divorce they are hugely dependent on the alimony they get to be solvent economically. Many of us even leave our career in the middle of the road to manage our home and raise our children better.
Well, this is all very good and there is nothing wrong with it apart from losing our economic independence which can be fatal to our own identity as a human being. I personally am a witness of such an unfortunate case. One of my very close friends dropped out of school and got married to the love of her life throwing away her future as an individual. After ten years of marriage, being a mom and a housewife of a now cheating husband, all she got in return is a cursed caged life which she can’t break free just because she is economically not independent.
So, whatever you do, don’t throw away your career to become a part of someone else’s life because a relationship is happy and healthy when you and your partner are equal in it, both depending on each other for emotional support not for a financial one. Let your marriage breathe by making it a ‘want and need’ not a ‘need’ only.
Feminism and women are inseparable because it shows us what we truly are and what we really deserve, standing out for us, setting us to the right direction and this way we can break free of the invisible yet still ever existing iron cage and fly high in the free sky.